It is a time-honored tradition for the groom to choose among his closest family or friends to bestow the honor of being the Best Man. If you’ve been asked to be the best man for your brother’s or best friend’s wedding, you’ve likely been the groom’s number one dude throughout most, if not all, his life. And now that he is getting married, he leans on you more than ever to be THAT guy. Forget not that with the honor of being asked to be a best man come duties and responsibilities. You have been entrusted with a significant role, and now is not the time to disappoint.
Before the Wedding
Before the big day, one of your first (and perhaps, most important) responsibilities is to plan and organize a bucks party for the groom. It will be best to involve the groom in planning the kind of party he wants — if he wants one at all. Pick a date that is most convenient for the groom — not for you. Next, decide on a theme or activity around which the party will revolve. Bachelor parties don’t always need to be raunchy, rowdy, or loud.
You could make a day of it at a beach or throw a yacht party and rent jet skis for a full day of speed and sun. You could rent a small field and plan a full-on football match with all the groomsmen, friends, and male family members. Or you can plan something more low-key like watching a big boxing or basketball event, a poker all-nighter, paintballing, or a trip to the casinos.
Be ready to assist the groom in pre-wedding tasks like tux fittings and pre-nuptial shoots. Always be on time for the fittings and make sure the other groomsmen are prompt, too. You and the groomsmen should make yourselves available (and on time!) for location photography shoots or rehearsal dinners.
During the Wedding
On the wedding day, one of your foremost, enduring responsibilities is to help keep the groom chill and in good spirits. Not with beers, though. There could be some lull just before the ceremonies when you can just hang out, play some video games, or just talk. Your main goal is to make sure the groom has everything he needs — including his head in place. You’re the one responsible for securing the marriage license, passports, and plane tickets (that is, if they are leaving for their honeymoon right after the event), and other groom accessories. Set them aside so you can easily hand them back to the groom at the end of the day.
You might also be the one designated to drive the groom to the wedding venue. If so, make sure you get there at least half an hour before the schedule. At the ceremony, your duty is to stand by and close to the groom, always at the ready for anything he might need. Most vital, hold on to the wedding rings until they are called for by the officiant.
At the reception, you’re typically the one to open the floor to toasting by giving your best man speech. If you’re not one with the words, make sure you’ve had your speech typed, printed out, and handy for the party. Saving your speech on your mobile phone might not be the best idea as you may run out of battery before then.
After the Wedding
If there is a “getaway” bridal car, sneak out during the wedding party with the groomsmen and decorate it. Make it flashy, maybe even a little embarrassing, but nothing over-the-top that ‘a little embarrassing’ crosses over to ‘a lot offensive.’ Tying some cans with string from the trunk is still classic, matched with a gaudy ‘Just Married’ sign.
As much as you can, do stick around the party for some time after the couple has left. You can make a gracious lap around the party venue and thank guests or other members of the bridal party on the couple’s behalf. They could’ve overlooked some with all the night’s excitement.
As one of the leads of the bridal party, you should be able to exercise flawless restraint when consuming alcohol during the wedding party. Always keep your “best foot forward,” so to speak. After all, it is not every day that you are given an opportunity to be the best at being the best. Cheers!