Marriage is supposed to be the foundation of a family. It consists of two people who love each other and who are willing to spend the rest of their life together.
Sadly, happily ever after isn’t the automatic ending for all marriages, especially when challenges come in the most common habits we’ve gotten used to. Think your phone is useful? It might be the end of your marriage.
Distractions don’t go away just because you’re married. They are still there, but you might ignore them or not notice them at all. Your devotion to your marriage and your happiness with your spouse makes you feel content and not looking for validation elsewhere.
When couples go to marriage counseling in Broomfield, one of the most common problems they share with their counselor is neglect. One spouse may be busy with work, and their emotional disengagement in the relationship is resulting in self-doubt in their spouse. They feel neglected, and a host of problems arise from that.
Cheating Is Not Always the Problem
A neglected spouse does not automatically decide to cheat. Sometimes, they turn to other sources of happiness — albeit misguided — with hopes that it will save their marriage without talking about the problem. That seemingly innocent phone becomes more of a companion than a device as neglected spouses busy themselves with things they see online.
They may not see the distractions in the real world, but they have already fallen prey to the endless refresh of their mobile screens. But how does your mobile phone become this powerful? The happy hormone is to blame for it.
Finding Happiness in the Wrong Place
Smoking, gambling, and even shopping make a person feel good because of the release of the hormone called endorphin. Everyone can agree that smoking and gambling are harmful to your health, which is why they need regulation. When shopping reaches an extent, it becomes problematic, too.
What you don’t know is that the likes you get from social media have the same effect on your brain. That release in endorphin makes you want to post more, to chase more likes. It’s an addictive behavior — and it is not regulated.
Before you know it, you spend more time on your phone because it makes you feel good. Meanwhile, you feel desensitized to the problems in your marriage.
It Takes Two to Fix a Problem
It’s not too late to fix your marriage, but you will need to recognize the problems. That includes your dependence on your phone. Thankfully, when compared with smoking, gambling, and shopping, phone addiction is relatively easy to “treat.”
There are movements these days toward digital minimalism, the first step of which is for you to delete the addictive apps on your phone. When the distraction is inaccessible, you have a better shot at appropriating your attention to your spouse and communicating with each other.
Remember that mobile phone addiction might not be the sole cause of your marital problems. Don’t stop there. Get to the bottom of what’s hurting your marriage so that you and your spouse can move forward together.